Nora Doesn't Like This Post

I was once told by a blogger I admire that the more you share about yourself, the better your blogging experience.  I can’t say I agree, but then, I wouldn’t know.  There is a great deal I would never write on a blog, much less say aloud to people I love.  

We’ve come a long way from the privacy of the hand-written journal, which, if you ask me, is kind of sad.  It is a beautiful art form meant to contain what we  cannot confide in another person; things better left unsaid and mercifully forgotten with time.  Or, at least, things by which we can later measure our progress.  Aside from the occasional misadventure, that is - you know, the kind wherein everyone learns a great deal about themselves and humanity from reading a private journal.

I always wondered what Anne Frank would say if she knew her secrets were well-read.

I doubt whether her writing would have been quite so profound.  We phrase things differently when presenting them to another person.  We are less honest.

Take me, for instance.  I’d rather write it off as fiction.  It might begin like this:

She had met her insecurities before; in fact, she knew them rather well. 

She being so vague and undefined, you know.  She could be anyone.  We could call her Nora and no one would be the wiser.  Or you might be perceptive and realize I am writing about myself (especially considering I just told you).

Recently I've been dealing with an onslaught of insecurities, the aftermath of a big decision that had to be made.  You know, the kind you think about until you cannot think clearly; the kind that makes you question who you are and what you want.  Thus the insecurities.  

In the interest of full disclosure (I never intended to use that phrase on this blog), I had to withdraw from the grad school program I was supposed to begin in January.   It just isn't the right time.  She says, vaguely.

The point of all this (and yes, there is one) is that I've reached a conclusion about how I want my life to be, despite the disappointments.  You won't mind if I sum it up with a few anonymous and somewhat-cliche quotes, will you?  Nora thinks you might.

"Change your thoughts and you will change your world."

I have decided that I am going to stop criticizing who I am.  To embrace the creative-free-spirited-artist I feel inside of me.  To view my life as beautiful even if it doesn't go as planned. 

"You do what you do, and they do what they do."

I have decided to stop measuring myself against other people.  I intend to spend the next couple years exploring Europe, raising my kid, getting involved in my church community, working online, making art, writing and editing and querying agencies, and a few other things I won't mention just yet. 

"Be so happy that when others look at you, they become happy too."

I have decided to be happy.

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... Nora thinks this post is cheesy.